I’ve been having a conversation with myself recently centered around the question of ‘What would you do if no one was watching?’
Obviously, social media and blogs can have a profound effect on lives and what people choose to do. I’ve been maintaining one blog or another for nearly a decade now and The FaceBook tells me that I also joined in 2004, though it doesn’t seem like I actually did anything with it until several years later. That’s a decade of public broadcasting of my activities, censored, of course, knowing that my parents read it, and really, they don’t have to know some of the situations I’ve gotten myself into over the years.
Of course, we could argue the benefits and detriments of social media until Scott learns to like beer (never), but I’ve definitely used it as inspiration to do some of the things I do.
I like doing cool shit and then telling a story about it.
I like it when other people do cool shit and then come back and write about it and make me want to go do cool shit.
Of course, the negative side of this is that there’s a line of doing things because we want to and doing it because we want to go home and have a story to tell.
So I’ve spent some time thinking, ‘If I took an Internet hiatus and stopped writing, what would I do?’
This, of course, was spawned from having a million ideas of what I want to do in the next 12 months and having no clear frontrunner.
But after some pondering, the question sort of reframed itself: What would you do if you didn’t care if you failed?
Nobody likes to fail in the public eye.
Enter running. Scott was the instigator of this one because, apparently, he doesn’t really feel like riding his bike all that much these days either.
I suck at running. The fastest mile I’ve ever run is 8:15 in highschool. I thought I was pretty quick. But all in all, I’m slow, I’m uncoordinated, I dawdle when I walk, and I trip all over myself, especially downhill. Dying moose. I’d say I resemble a dying moose.
But the beauty of it is, I’m fully okay with sucking. I don’t care if people look at me and say, ‘Ooh, she should probably stop because that just looks painful and she’s going to knock all her teeth out when she trips over that rock.’ There is absolutely no ego attachment to my running shoes.
And right now, for me, that’s awesome because I don’t feel like any one expects anything from me in the form of a good adventure and a good story. I don’t expect anything from me. I don’t need to go ride the CDT to feel like I did something cool, going out and running 3 miles on the backyard trails at under a 10 min/mile pace was HUGE!
So I think I’m going to run for a while. Take some pictures. And hopefully be able to tell some good stories. Because I like sharing. And I think running could take me to some really cool places where I have no desire to drag my bike to.